Awake.

Blue.

Sometimes is good to be alone, but sometimes not.

A heartbrokened day, but I'm alone now.

He doesn't know how much I needed him now. That much. Really much.

But I understand his situation that he cannpt spend his time on me for now.

I'm always trying to be open-minded, be optimistic, just that today's incident was just too much.

My body was shivering when I saw that, and my tears starting to fall.

I just can't control myself from crying. Since when I'm being such a 'cryful' person ? ...

Heart was being tearing, tears was being pushing out from my eyes. It was just too much.

I'm alwasy being suspicious on him about the girl, as he promised me he would never touch on her things ever, as I don't want to compare myself with her, as she's his first love.

The worse was, the girl was there too. Shittest thing ever.When I saw his internet history, he is still viewing on her profile.

He still wants update from her.

The moment was $%#$%^&*#.

Undescribable feeling. I'm mad, I'm sad, I'm being very aggresive and ignorance.

I left him behind without saying any words, as he knew what I do mind about.

There is no other feeling as this. I can feel everything, embarras, being lied.

How wish there's a corner for me to hide to. I feel so stupid.

Sometimes and somehow I feel that there's distance between us.

He said that we should seperate for some period, to focus on our studies.

It doesn't work, we still do care about each other.

We are just like one, when he's happy, I'm happy. While I'm sad, he's sad too.

But he always mentioned, we have no future. But why ? He just cannot give me an answer.

I hoped this is just a time that he really want to set himself down, have some times to concentrate. If it's like that I'm fine about it.
By this moment, I just want to know what does he thinks. What's in his mind.

I feel so stupid that I'm concentration on the wrong person.

The girl which looks nothing, it's actually a big threat. The girl which I care and mind about, it;s actually not a big deal. But still, I don't like both of them VERY MUCH.

I'll put more effort in this relationship. I will change my attitude that he doesn't like.

I KNOW I WILL.

Wishign us to be back like last time, which everyone always says,

the startinig of a relationship is always the happeist.

Although this incident left a scar, but I will still love him.

Although the girl will always be around, but I will still love him.

Although I can't control what he wanna view, but i will still love him.
Hope everything works in the future time.